You know the drill. Furtive
glances across the lunch room.
Lingering for small talk at the
water cooler. Hallway smiles and
joke-swapping. Office crushes sure
make the workday more
interesting—and give you the
inspiration to dress a little
sharper for that Monday morning
meeting, too.
But is dating someone at work a
fortunate turn of events or a
disaster waiting to happen? Your
best chance at fanning your
workday crush into a hot
relationship—or dousing those
sparks in time to avoid any
unwanted drama—is to carefully
consider the pros and cons.
Factors in your favor include the
fact that working together may
allow you to observe this person's
strengths and weaknesses in a
non-dating environment. You may
have already seen how he or she
handles stress and treats peers.
There's also a good chance that,
working for the same employer,
the two of you enjoy similar work
hours and holidays. You also bring
to a new relationship a shared
"world," complete with friends,
colleagues, goals, and even values.
But that shared world is not
without risks. Will your
relationship become topic of office
gossip? Will co-workers become
jealous or resentful? Will office
politics pose a problem? Will
dating someone at work change
the way co-workers or supervisors
regard you?
There's also the matter of how
your dating relationship might
impact job performance. If you
become distracted by the
excitement of your new romance—
or distraught if that relationship
goes awry—will you be less
effective? Ultimately, you have
been hired to accomplish certain
tasks for your company or
organization. If working in close
proximity to your love interest
makes it tough to keep your
personal life from affecting your
professional productivity, then
dating a co-worker might not be
the best choice.
You'll also want to consider the
financial impact of a potential
breakup. Would working together
post-relationship be comfortable
or even possible? If not, could you
transfer to another department or
location? Would you feel the need
to find a new job elsewhere? In a
down economy, would that even
be feasible?
Even with the risks, it's not
uncommon for singles to form
happy, lasting romantic
relationships with a co-worker.
After all, it's where most people
spend more than half of our
waking hours.
If you're considering dating
someone at work, the following
guidelines can increase the odds of
the experience being one you'll
enjoy rather than regret:
Understand the policies of
your company or
organization. Some companies
strictly forbid employees dating.
Others permit it with full
disclosure to supervisors. Still
others require a signed contract or
agreement, which stipulates
workplace protocol to avoid
conflicts of interest. Make sure
that by dating someone at work,
you're not breaking rules and
putting both of your jobs in
jeopardy.
Avoid relationships with
direct superiors or people
who answer directly to you.
Dating someone near to you on
the chain of command is fraught
with complications. There is the
potential for favoritism, abuse of
power, or conflicts of interest, not
to mention gossip among
colleagues. Even if you make sure
everything is above-board, you
don't need your workplace peers
thinking the worst.
Keep the boundaries clear
between your personal and
professional lives. Dating
someone FROM work doesn't
mean dating someone AT work.
While on the job, your focus
should be 100 percent on your
responsibilities, not your
romance. What you do outside of
work is your business; what you
do at work is your employer's
business.
Maintain discretion. Keeping
clear boundaries also means
ensuring discreet behavior. Don't
make co-workers uncomfortable
by displaying your affection when
things are going well, or airing
your grievances if things go awry.
And don't use office email for
personal communication—it not
only interferes with whatever
you're supposed to be doing, your
gushing expressions of love may
not be as private as you think.
The exciting thing about love is
that you never know where it will
find you. If it finds you at work,
losing your heart can be a
wonderful experience–as long as
you keep a clear head in the
process.
Have you dated a co-worker?
Was it a good experience?
What advice would you give
to others contemplating this?
www.josiahdele.blogspot.com
glances across the lunch room.
Lingering for small talk at the
water cooler. Hallway smiles and
joke-swapping. Office crushes sure
make the workday more
interesting—and give you the
inspiration to dress a little
sharper for that Monday morning
meeting, too.
But is dating someone at work a
fortunate turn of events or a
disaster waiting to happen? Your
best chance at fanning your
workday crush into a hot
relationship—or dousing those
sparks in time to avoid any
unwanted drama—is to carefully
consider the pros and cons.
Factors in your favor include the
fact that working together may
allow you to observe this person's
strengths and weaknesses in a
non-dating environment. You may
have already seen how he or she
handles stress and treats peers.
There's also a good chance that,
working for the same employer,
the two of you enjoy similar work
hours and holidays. You also bring
to a new relationship a shared
"world," complete with friends,
colleagues, goals, and even values.
But that shared world is not
without risks. Will your
relationship become topic of office
gossip? Will co-workers become
jealous or resentful? Will office
politics pose a problem? Will
dating someone at work change
the way co-workers or supervisors
regard you?
There's also the matter of how
your dating relationship might
impact job performance. If you
become distracted by the
excitement of your new romance—
or distraught if that relationship
goes awry—will you be less
effective? Ultimately, you have
been hired to accomplish certain
tasks for your company or
organization. If working in close
proximity to your love interest
makes it tough to keep your
personal life from affecting your
professional productivity, then
dating a co-worker might not be
the best choice.
You'll also want to consider the
financial impact of a potential
breakup. Would working together
post-relationship be comfortable
or even possible? If not, could you
transfer to another department or
location? Would you feel the need
to find a new job elsewhere? In a
down economy, would that even
be feasible?
Even with the risks, it's not
uncommon for singles to form
happy, lasting romantic
relationships with a co-worker.
After all, it's where most people
spend more than half of our
waking hours.
If you're considering dating
someone at work, the following
guidelines can increase the odds of
the experience being one you'll
enjoy rather than regret:
Understand the policies of
your company or
organization. Some companies
strictly forbid employees dating.
Others permit it with full
disclosure to supervisors. Still
others require a signed contract or
agreement, which stipulates
workplace protocol to avoid
conflicts of interest. Make sure
that by dating someone at work,
you're not breaking rules and
putting both of your jobs in
jeopardy.
Avoid relationships with
direct superiors or people
who answer directly to you.
Dating someone near to you on
the chain of command is fraught
with complications. There is the
potential for favoritism, abuse of
power, or conflicts of interest, not
to mention gossip among
colleagues. Even if you make sure
everything is above-board, you
don't need your workplace peers
thinking the worst.
Keep the boundaries clear
between your personal and
professional lives. Dating
someone FROM work doesn't
mean dating someone AT work.
While on the job, your focus
should be 100 percent on your
responsibilities, not your
romance. What you do outside of
work is your business; what you
do at work is your employer's
business.
Maintain discretion. Keeping
clear boundaries also means
ensuring discreet behavior. Don't
make co-workers uncomfortable
by displaying your affection when
things are going well, or airing
your grievances if things go awry.
And don't use office email for
personal communication—it not
only interferes with whatever
you're supposed to be doing, your
gushing expressions of love may
not be as private as you think.
The exciting thing about love is
that you never know where it will
find you. If it finds you at work,
losing your heart can be a
wonderful experience–as long as
you keep a clear head in the
process.
Have you dated a co-worker?
Was it a good experience?
What advice would you give
to others contemplating this?
www.josiahdele.blogspot.com
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