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11 Brutal Truths About Loving An Assertive Woman (As Told By One)

She's a handful, but she's so worth
it.
So you've met a loud and assertive
woman and you've fallen in love with her,
have you? Or perhaps you want to fall for
her, but she intimidates you.
Here's what you need to know about your
loud, spunky, assertive lady ... as written
by one!
1. She can't help but draw attention
to herself.
Even when I'm just mellow, I seem to call
attention to myself. Actually, I don't
notice that anyone is paying attention to
me, but old partners of mine have pointed
out: "Hey, people are insert X (looking,
reacting, etc.) to you."
Assertive women own the space they
walk in, and if they're loud or spunky to
boot — even if they're just saying
hi — someone might notice. It's not
necessarily intentional.
When I step onto a train or head into a
Starbucks I don't consider it a defining
moment to "work the runway." Nope, I'm
just your average short girl who is
moving forward with her day, but I do
smile a lot and move with a rapid pace.
The smile alone is enough to garner
attention in this humdrum world.
Your loud and assertive babe will draw
attention by her energy, and not
necessarily because she wants the
spotlight. If you don't like it, guess whose
problem that is? Your own insecure self's
problem and not hers.
Be glad she's someone who genuinely
sparks a positive response from other
people.
2. She can command the stage.
If a loud and sassy lady does want to
command a situation, she will ... and very
easily. People like her, yet people are also
taken aback by her at times because she's
female and assertive — something society
says a woman should most certainly not
be.
You might find yourself feeling a little
"small" or threatened by her ability to
work the crowd, but you shouldn't.
Instead, you should be glad your woman
is confident enough to do what she needs
to without hanging on your arm like a
little wallflower.
If you can't help but feel uncomfortable
when she's working the room, that's a
shame because a man should want a
strong woman.
3. She chooses you, but she doesn't
need you.
An assertive woman can find company
anywhere she goes, so rest assured, if
she's chosen to spend time with you, she
wants you, she just doesn't need you.
There's a big difference between needing
and wanting someone's company.
4. She's tired of people thinking
she's scary.
We, the union of loud, spunky, assertive
women, are tired of being deemed "scary"
by men. We are tired of guys walking
away with their tails between their legs.
We know that we are living in a man's
world to some extent (even in 2015), and
it sucks to be considering frightening
instead of just ourselves.
We know that if we were a more docile
creature we would have men and partners
licking out of our hands perhaps, but
apparently we have signs on our backs
that say, "Beware of Woman: Talk at
Your Own Risk."
5. She will always tell you the truth.
A loud and assertive woman will always
be honest with you. You won't have to
worry about her holding back how she
feels or pulling a few lies on you.
She's not one to hold back how she feels
and if she does try to tell a white lie or
something to save someone's feelings,
she's pretty terrible at it.
6. She enjoys being the leader, but
she can also share the role.
Just because you're in love with the Boss
Lady doesn't mean she wants you to sit
back and do her bidding. Not at all. In
fact, she likes when her man can lead and
take over.
For me, it is especially exciting when a
man can be assertive in the bedroom. I'll
just leave that right there.
7. She's not all show tunes and
showdowns 24/7.
Your lass may be an assertive little
fireball, but she's not always like that.
Sometimes, your woman wants to take a
seat, quiet down, or shun the "scene," yet
people have a hard time with her taking
the backseat because they've grown to
expect the showgirl to show up.
Cut her a break and love her even when
she's not quite herself, and don't expect
her to be the entertainment every time
you two are out at a social gathering. It
can be taxing to have that type of
pressure when she sometimes just wants
to sit back and let someone else take the
reins.
Men who love the sassy ladies? Be sure to
take charge. She'll appreciate this and it
will give her a little break when she needs
her off time.
8. She is capable of being quiet.
I remember befriending a man who
turned to me once and said, "Wow, you
can be pretty quiet ... and serious.
Hmm." I'm capable of sitting and reading
a very large book by myself in peace and
quiet with no one around.
I'm capable of putting on the serious face
and staying solemn when I have to. I'm
not a circus and I don't always want to
talk. Some days, I'm just quiet and that's
okay.
Loud and assertive women don't always
want to chit-chat with you, and no, it
doesn't mean we're angry at you.
9. Silence is typically a bad thing.
If we've grown mum, distant, or aloof
over a period of time and not just for the
day or two, your assertive babe is most
certainly upset, and possibly angry at you.
While your woman would normally tell
you directly how she feels, when our
feelings are hurt we just want to walk
away rather than pour our bold, honest,
emotional heart out.
10. She will root for you.
Your sassy little sidekick will be your
biggest, most audible and genuine
supporter. When you fall down, she won't
BS you about your mistakes, but she will
be the right there before you even ask to
help you back up.
When you accomplish something, she'll
be the first one to clap. There is no one
more passionate or loyal than a loud,
assertive woman.
11. She has a good heart.
Behind the chutzpah and bold exterior
lies a very passionate and sensitive heart
that wants to be loved and is tired of
being misunderstood. Don't assume your
bold and assertive woman is made of
steel. She wants to be held just as much
as your sweet girl-next-door.
If you choose to fall for a loud and
assertive woman, you are in for the best
(but slightly wild) ride of your life. And
once she's yours, she's yours for good.

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