The word "sex" may have more explosive
connotations and baffling confusion attached to it than any other word in the
English language. And the idea of "sex
appeal" is just like it. It's got power all
right. That may be why you're reading
this article. We all want to have sex
appeal. We might not agree on exactly
what the term means, but if someone
accused us of having it, we wouldn't
argue with them.
If you have sex appeal, it means there's
something about you that makes
persons of the opposite sex want to be as
close to you as possible. There is
something so attractive about you that
they want to bond with you.
But this is where we have to think very
carefully. Clearly, we like the idea of
persons of the opposite sex finding us so
appealing that they want to become one
with us. What a compliment! But what
part of you do they want to become one
with—just your body, or your body,
mind, and soul? In the larger scheme of
things, our bodies are but a small part of
the totality of us. Our minds are
thousands of times more complex and
unique, and what we call our souls are
the deepest parts of us, the parts that
are so central to our being that their
value to us is beyond words, beyond
measurement. Most of us are just
beginning to understand our souls a
little bit. We have flashes of awareness
of how unique our souls are, how they
contain all the really precious parts
about us, and we literally shudder at the
idea of playing fast and loose with this
unbelievably masterful part of our
identity. We're the only person in the
history of the world with the soul we
have, and if we gained the whole world,
but lost our soul, we would have lost
everything.
So, when we talk about sex appeal, we're
talking about being someone whose
whole package appeals to the kind of
person who will relate to the entirety of
us. While the place to start may be with
our physical appearance, it's only about
10% of the total process. There's not a
thing in the world wrong with watching
your weight, toning your body, choosing
the right haircut, wearing stylish
clothes, and following every last rule of
physical hygiene. You will make yourself
far more appealing physically, and you
will already be 10% of the way to a sex
appeal that will draw the kind of person
you are dreaming of.
And then the fun begins! The next 30%
of sex appeal is about getting your mind
in shape. The health of your mind has
little to do with your intelligence rating.
You may have an I.Q. of 90 or a 100 or a
130. At any intelligence level, the critical
question is how healthy is your mind?
Just as the health of your body is a
consequence of what you feed it, how
often you exercise it, the amount of rest
you grant it, and how you protect it
against disease, the same is true of your
mind. If you want to have a really
healthy mind, feed it good stuff–
stimulating reading material, uplifting
and inspirational music, challenging
conversation about major topics, and
time to reflect. And exercise it. Take on
some fascinating new reading material
about subjects that at first glance seem
too much for you. Join some new groups
that tax you to your edges. Keep trying
new things. As your mind grows bigger
and stronger, your sex appeal will
literally multiply.
And then, the real secret of sex appeal!
You may think it's an exaggeration, but
60% of lasting sex appeal is all about
your soul. There are just three things to
do to get your soul healthy. First, get to
know it. Go inside yourself, clear to the
center of you, and become a close friend
of your soul. This usually requires time
alone, time for reflection, meditation
and/or prayer. Second, get yourself
powerfully loved at the deepest of levels
—loved in a durable way, loved
unconditionally. And finally, get about
the task of becoming unswervingly
authentic. Let your soul be at the center
of your life, rather than trapped in a
dark basement of your being.
We bet you're wondering how this article
turned from sex appeal into a discussion
of body, mind and soul. Well, because
most people fall for the old idea that sex
appeal is all about your body. Some of
them get (or are already are) physically
attractive but go on to neglect their
minds and souls. They snag a lot of fish
from the sea. And usually, these
relationships deteriorate as soon as they
got beyond the first 10% layer. On the
other hand, wiser people build their sex
appeal around the beauty of their bodies,
the magnificence of their minds, and the
delicacy and vibrancy of their souls—and
those relationships are the ones that
flourish increasingly over time.
www.trueheart2love.diydating.com
connotations and baffling confusion attached to it than any other word in the
English language. And the idea of "sex
appeal" is just like it. It's got power all
right. That may be why you're reading
this article. We all want to have sex
appeal. We might not agree on exactly
what the term means, but if someone
accused us of having it, we wouldn't
argue with them.
If you have sex appeal, it means there's
something about you that makes
persons of the opposite sex want to be as
close to you as possible. There is
something so attractive about you that
they want to bond with you.
But this is where we have to think very
carefully. Clearly, we like the idea of
persons of the opposite sex finding us so
appealing that they want to become one
with us. What a compliment! But what
part of you do they want to become one
with—just your body, or your body,
mind, and soul? In the larger scheme of
things, our bodies are but a small part of
the totality of us. Our minds are
thousands of times more complex and
unique, and what we call our souls are
the deepest parts of us, the parts that
are so central to our being that their
value to us is beyond words, beyond
measurement. Most of us are just
beginning to understand our souls a
little bit. We have flashes of awareness
of how unique our souls are, how they
contain all the really precious parts
about us, and we literally shudder at the
idea of playing fast and loose with this
unbelievably masterful part of our
identity. We're the only person in the
history of the world with the soul we
have, and if we gained the whole world,
but lost our soul, we would have lost
everything.
So, when we talk about sex appeal, we're
talking about being someone whose
whole package appeals to the kind of
person who will relate to the entirety of
us. While the place to start may be with
our physical appearance, it's only about
10% of the total process. There's not a
thing in the world wrong with watching
your weight, toning your body, choosing
the right haircut, wearing stylish
clothes, and following every last rule of
physical hygiene. You will make yourself
far more appealing physically, and you
will already be 10% of the way to a sex
appeal that will draw the kind of person
you are dreaming of.
And then the fun begins! The next 30%
of sex appeal is about getting your mind
in shape. The health of your mind has
little to do with your intelligence rating.
You may have an I.Q. of 90 or a 100 or a
130. At any intelligence level, the critical
question is how healthy is your mind?
Just as the health of your body is a
consequence of what you feed it, how
often you exercise it, the amount of rest
you grant it, and how you protect it
against disease, the same is true of your
mind. If you want to have a really
healthy mind, feed it good stuff–
stimulating reading material, uplifting
and inspirational music, challenging
conversation about major topics, and
time to reflect. And exercise it. Take on
some fascinating new reading material
about subjects that at first glance seem
too much for you. Join some new groups
that tax you to your edges. Keep trying
new things. As your mind grows bigger
and stronger, your sex appeal will
literally multiply.
And then, the real secret of sex appeal!
You may think it's an exaggeration, but
60% of lasting sex appeal is all about
your soul. There are just three things to
do to get your soul healthy. First, get to
know it. Go inside yourself, clear to the
center of you, and become a close friend
of your soul. This usually requires time
alone, time for reflection, meditation
and/or prayer. Second, get yourself
powerfully loved at the deepest of levels
—loved in a durable way, loved
unconditionally. And finally, get about
the task of becoming unswervingly
authentic. Let your soul be at the center
of your life, rather than trapped in a
dark basement of your being.
We bet you're wondering how this article
turned from sex appeal into a discussion
of body, mind and soul. Well, because
most people fall for the old idea that sex
appeal is all about your body. Some of
them get (or are already are) physically
attractive but go on to neglect their
minds and souls. They snag a lot of fish
from the sea. And usually, these
relationships deteriorate as soon as they
got beyond the first 10% layer. On the
other hand, wiser people build their sex
appeal around the beauty of their bodies,
the magnificence of their minds, and the
delicacy and vibrancy of their souls—and
those relationships are the ones that
flourish increasingly over time.
www.trueheart2love.diydating.com
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