armed with the right tools so that it's
your forever relationship?
You and a man can have lots of shared
interests and similar goals, but if you
don't connect with him where it counts –
his heart – then nothing else matters. If
you've ever felt that something was missing with a man – like you just couldn't reach his heart, or that your
conversations with him had somewhat
of a superficial quality to them – then
read on. There IS a way to connect with
a man on a deeper, forever level, right
from the start…
BE FULLY PRESENT WITH HIM
A man can't connect with you if you're
anywhere other than with him. And this
includes being in your head. If you're on
a first date and worried from the outset
about whether there will be a second
date, you're missing out on key
opportunities to connect with a man.
Your only job when you first meet him is
to fully enjoy the experience and be right
where you are. Savor your dinner, let
yourself truly unwind on a walk, take in
the sights all around you. When he sees
that you can let go like that in the
moment, he'll sense that he's with a
woman whose only agenda is to enjoy
his company. That takes enormous
pressure off a man, making him feel
comfortable enough to let you into his
heart.
BE CURIOUS ABOUT HIM
You know what they say – everyone's
favorite subject is themselves. And a
great way to instantly connect with a
man is to show that you're genuinely
interested in what he's all about.
So, if you feel the temptation to show a
date what a great catch you are by giving
him a rundown of all your
accomplishments, volunteer efforts,
great adventures, etc. – stop. Pace
yourself. I'm not telling you not to tell a
man these things, you absolutely can
and should, just not all at once. There
will be plenty of time for him to peel
back the layers and find out what makes
you so great when he asks you out
again. And he will, if he feels he's with a
woman who truly wants to know more
about him.
BE VULNERABLE FIRST
True intimacy and connection happen as
a result of two people feeling safe enough
to fully reveal themselves in front of the
other. And someone has to start. So let
it be you. This means you let him in on
your true feelings – and even your
fears. Say you have a big presentation
coming up at work, and you're really
nervous. Rather than trying to pretend
you've got it all under control, tell him
what's really going on for you. When
you do, you'll give him the message that
you're not perfect – and this is a great
thing! He'll feel relief that he's with a
real human who experiences real
emotion, and he'll feel safe enough to
share HIS inner experiences with you.
Do you notice what all these connection
"rules" have in common? They're all
about "being" rather than "doing." The
truth is, you don't have to DO anything
to connect with a man's heart – you
don't need to cook for him, or plan a
date, or try to get him to talk about his
feelings. All you need to do…is BE!
When you're fully present with him,
curious about him, and willing to show
your true colors to him, you're
communicating that you're comfortable
with yourself. And that in turn makes
him feel all the more comfortable – and
connected – with you.
www.trueheart2love.diydating.com
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