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Funny meanings.

…
CIGARETTE:

A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end and a fool at the other!
MARRIAGE:

It's an agreement wherein a man loses his bachelor's degree and a woman gains her master's.
CONFERENCE:

The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.
CONFERENCE ROOM

A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees in the end.
SMILE:

A curve that can set a lot of things straight!
YAWN:

The only opportunity some married men ever get to open their mouths.
EXPERIENCE:

The name men give to their mistakes.
DIPLOMAT:

A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip.
OPTIMIST:

A person who, while falling from the EIFFEL TOWER, says midway:
"SEE I AM NOT INJURED YET!"
BOSS:

Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.
POLITICIAN:

One who shakes your hand before elections and your confidence afterward.
DOCTOR:

A person who kills your ills with pills and later with his bills…

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